A pair of white strappy sandals made the first day of junior high one of those moments you never forget. You know one of those moments where you want to go home and crawl in bed and never get up. It just stays with you in the very back of your mind and you always wonder what if.
Since I was going to junior high, my parents wanted to help me start the school year right. They wanted me to have some “stylish” outfits. In those days, hot pants, short skirts and mini dresses were considered the “in” clothes. Of course at my school the “in” kids wore Levi’s pulled down low, hang ten T shirts or jeans and gauze shirts. My parents did not allow me to wear jeans to school, matter of fact I didn’t own my first pair of blue jeans until college.
So I headed off to the first day of junior high in my tasteful little hot pants outfit with some very shiny white strappy sandals with a chunky 3 inch heel. Keep in mind I am still a little chunky, not really fat but not skinny either, just plump. All day long I held my head up very proud, clopped around school in my fashionable outfit with my chunky heeled white sandals.
On the inside I was dying, I just wanted to be one of those kids in cool color Levi cords, a gauze oversized shirt and maybe some cute flat sandals. This is one of those reoccurring patterns. On the surface I am considered a confident outgoing strong person, on the inside I am insecure and just wanting to belong.
Anyway, I had made it through the day; I was feeling pretty good about myself. I was riding the bus home, as in everyone’s past; there is one of those groups of girl’s you just hated. They were the bully’s, the mean girls as much as you hated them, you really wanted to belong, be one of the “in” girls. So as the bus pulls up to my stop and I am getting off the bus, holding my head up high, as I pass “the girls” and someone says something, I smile and respond. I am so excited; maybe just maybe they want to be friends with me. Maybe mom was right, it was all about being stylish! As I step down the steps, I lose my footing, the chunky heel on my white sandals snaps off, I fall off the bus, on to the ground, my heel bounces down on me. As I quickly stand up I can see my knees are scratched and bleeding. My new outfit is covered in dirt and gravel. As kids do, they start to laugh, the bus driver jumps to help and I do what I always do, stand up quickly, try to make a joke, brush myself off and say I am okay.
I walk away from the bus trying very hard not to cry or seem hurt. The bus pulls away and I slowly limp home in tears, completely crushed and my brand new strappy sandals are broken. I remember in that moment thinking I don’t want to see anyone again, I wanted to hide. Like all of these moments in our lives, somehow we pick our self up and move on. After all tomorrow is another day!
When I wonder what if….I hadn’t fallen off the bus, would things be any different? Then I wonder if this was one of those defining moments? Or…was it a “divine” intervention? Was this one of those moments that is given to us by a higher power to remind us of who we are, keep us humble providing us a life lesson.
Lessons learned. Nothing is so bad you can’t get up and face your fears. Don’t laugh at someone falling, or for that matter don’t make fun of anyone’s misfortune, as it could be you. And the last lesson no more white strappy 3 inch heel sandals.
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